A board chair shared two experiences around fundraising where unclear expectations led to frustration and lost connections for the organization. Because of these incidents, she asserts that while board members have a vital role to play in fundraising, the organization should own the relationships. And she maintains that if the host of an event will not share the guest list and contact information, it is not worth having the event.

Boards Connect; Staff Own Relationships

As told by a Board Chair somewhere in the U.S.

I’ve been on a lot of boards over the years. And one thing I’ve learned is that my biggest gift to any board — especially to fundraising boards — is my network. I’ve always seen my role as a bridge: connecting people I know to the organization’s mission and then stepping out of the middle so that relationship can grow directly between the donor and the staff.

Ideally, once I make an introduction, the development person or the executive director takes it from there. That’s what’s healthy — when relationships live with the organization, not with one board member.

But I’ll tell you, I’ve had a couple of experiences where that model just didn’t happen.

Not Sharing Information Leads to Unsuccessful Events

At one organization where I was board chair, we had this very influential couple join the board. They were generous donors themselves and well connected — a real “power couple.” At first, I was thrilled. They gave a major gift right away and then offered to have their friends host events to bring in their wealthy networks. It sounded perfect.

But that’s where things got messy. They insisted on total control. The events were lovely — elegant evenings, beautifully done — but they wouldn’t share the guest list. They wouldn’t even let the organization’s staff know who attended. No names, no contact information, no way for guests to opt in for further communication.

And then, when the events didn’t raise money, they’d express their frustration — as if the staff hadn’t done their job! It was baffling. I couldn’t even be in the room; they wouldn’t let me attend as board chair. I honestly don’t even know if an actual “ask” was made because I wasn’t there.

No Follow-up Without Contact Information

And then, in another organization, a similar situation occurred. We had a young advisory board member, very enthusiastic and well connected through her family. She hosted an event with her parent’s network — again, a room full of high-net-worth guests, a big success on the surface. But after the event, she refused to share any contact information. There was no way for the organization to follow up. And she wasn’t going to do it herself.

Be Explicit About Expectations for Events

Looking back, we were caught off guard both times. We assumed that of course we’d get the contact information — why wouldn’t we? We thought everyone understood the implicit rules of engagement — that if you host an event, you help the organization build relationships with your guests. Clearly not everyone understands this. And those assumptions cost us valuable connections.

So, when I am board chair or otherwise involved in planning, I have made changes. First, I insist on attending. Second, we spell everything out from the start. I mean really spell it out — expectations, timeframes, who does what, even an outline of the event from planning to follow-up.

• Here’s what the event will look like.
• Here’s how the organization will engage with your guests.
• Here’s how follow-up will happen.

We have hosts sign off on a clear plan. If they don’t agree, we can decide that is okay to proceed even if we don’t get the guest list or we can decide the effort of holding the event is not worthwhile. But at least we go into the situation knowing that we are not going to get the list.

We now put out a sign-up sheet at events— simple, no drama: “If you’d like us to follow up, please leave your name and contact information.” It allows guests to opt in. I do that even when the host gives us guest information. Knowing a prospect has chosen to give us their name can make all the difference. If someone signs up, it means they attended the event because they are at least curious, if not already passionate, about the cause. Because some people come to events because of social pressure. Or because it’s a fancy evening at a fancy house. The sign-up sheet helps prioritize and customize our follow-up.

Planning and implementing an event takes a lot of time and energy. I believe if there’s no mechanism for follow-up, it’s not worth doing the event.

Be Clear About the Role of Your Board in Fundraising

I know many board members are reluctant to help with fundraising. But I think every board member should play some role. Some board members are great at the entire process — identifying, cultivating, asking, stewarding. Others are better at just making introductions. Some can say thank you or help with stewardship. Regardless, when a new board member joins your board, you should be very clear that you expect them to help with fundraising. You can talk about the distinct roles they might have. And sometimes it will surprise you – who is good at what.

Also to make board members more comfortable, I try to frame fundraising differently. I don’t talk about asking for money. I say that when you invite someone to give, you’re offering them a chance to invest in something meaningful to them, to our community. You’re not taking something from them; you’re helping them make a difference in a cause they care about.

I also try to help board members understand the process. The “ask” is a small part of the journey. Understanding what interests the prospective donors and framing your message to align with their passions are the first steps which should be coordinated with staff. The “ask” must also be planned. It should be consistent, clear, and done by the right person. It should be strategic, not improvised. Sometimes people say Yes or No right away. Often, they need follow-up with additional information. Once a donation is given, the donor needs to be thanked. Then you have strategic touchpoints to ensure that the donor knows their money is being put to effective use. In all of this, the primary relationship should belong to the organization, with board members helping by making introductions, giving background information on the prospect or donor, hosting events, sharing why they are passionate about the organization, saying thank you, and sometimes even making the ask.   

Lessons Learned

• Be clear that you expect a guest list with contact information from any event.
• Make sure the host of any event agrees to the full process – what will happen at the event, who will follow up.
• Have a sign-up sheet to allow guests to opt-in for additional information.
• Be explicit that you expect board members to participate in fundraising.
• Have the staff coordinate the fundraising process for each prospect or donor with a clear and strategic ask, asker, and follow-up plan.
• Ensure that the relationship exists with the organization, not the individual.